Good Cop…

“Close the door. Sit down. Put your hands on the table. We have some questions for you. You will answer them quickly, you will answer them plainly. Do not embellish, do not digress. Keep your hands on the table.”

“Did you kill him yourself, or did you have help? Answer the question. Alone or assisted? Loud and clear now, you are being recorded! Oh stop that bloody simpering and answer. We have the body. Downstairs, right now, we have the body as well as your car. You stuffed him in the boot, dead as Caesar, then you passed out drunk on the back roads with the engine running. You’re done. It’s sorted. All that’s left is for you to say the soddin’ words. Give it up, lad. Answer the question, and keep your hands on the table.”

“Stop the recorder.”

“Right, then. I know you’re clean, lad. I put that bloke in the boot myself, after I took me hatchet to his back-brain. But now, you’re gonna confess. You’ll admit you did it alone, then beg forgiveness and mercy and all that shite. If you don’t; I’ll rape your sister and cripple your Dad. Now, keep your hands on the table, because I’m gonna shoot you through both of them in four seconds. Three. Two…..what? Alright. Alright, lad. Well done.”

“Start the tape again.”

“Were you alone?  Good lad.”

“You can put your hands down now.”